Even making this post seems more like an exercise in being heard than because I know what to say. Oh, there are all the great things that I’ve accomplished this week. There is the twist of the story that I discovered sometime after 1am that I wanted so much to develop when I woke up (but didn’t because I had made a promise to a friend to help out). I feel like I’m spinning my wheels.
But then I remember…. I have no wheels to spin.
If you’re wondering why I say that, here’s a trio of links for your edification:
I confess, I am still absorbing the first one. Who is this “I” person anyway? But can I say “I’ll think about it”?
The second one feels painfully devastating to my mind/flesh existence, a sense of loss of my writing words, my creativity… of my imaginary friends! My husband and I have these talks occasionally when I tell him how I understand on a very visceral level how “believing in belief” (here’s part II) can be so alluring even when one is not affiliated with any dedicated religious path. There is a part of me that needs for something unseen and beyond myself to exist in order for me to touch the worlds I write from. And while it’s probably not true that I need this belief…. I believe that I do, and I’m not quite ready to give up my belief.
However, I cannot say for sure yet that this is what Nick is trying to say here. Either way, it feels uncomfortably like I have been feeling lately, as if it just is, and I cannot touch it, but I can speak of its effects.
The last link? That I had no trouble getting my head around. And interestingly enough, it related to some of the topics discussed by Guy McPherson in the question and answer segment of his video The Myth of Sustainability. So many things we do for the sake of the individual. Yet we forget (or ignore) how much we affect each other. If we really did act with compassion…. What a change we could make in the world.
So there we go. That’s part of where my mind has been lately. That and watching my son and husband play Twister (I did not last long in the games).
Since this is midweek, I’m going to make this a mini. I’m a bit behind on my new story writing. The typing is going well. The editing I’m ahead on.
Even the other stuff… Today I put myself into Hootsuite. Testing the waters. Not sure I really like it. Been twitchy not having Facebook sitting there. It could also be due to my not having set it up fully. And I do NOT like the $6 a month cost. I’m weird that way, not big on subscriptions, though I don’t mind a larger one-time fee. We’ll see what happens.
I’m off to post this and to sleep and dream. Maybe tomorrow we’ll be off to co-op, maybe we won’t. Things are always in flux.
And that’s okay.