Down… Down down

Doo bee doo bee down

Waa, waa waaa–ah!

Yeah…  Sorry about that (kinda).  Just feeling a bit punchy this evening…


Stepping right in after last week’s post: Pinnacle, let me give you 8 small paragraphs (6 for the month minus 14 for the year).  We’re still in Atyr’s head here as she deals with ‘Listii and his sudden reluctance with her.


Down she fell from that pinnacle alone. Once she recovered from the landing, rough as it had been, she opened her eyes and looked at him. He’d already moved away from her and was laying at her side, touching her with gentle hands only.

In her shock she hadn’t broken the contact she’d opened. She felt his regret and apology before his gaze met hers.

“Not yet, Atyr,” he whispered, his gruff voice harsher than normal after their activity.

She wasn’t sure why he’d said that, despite the contact between their minds. He’d learned to shield himself that well. She started to ask why.

He smiled playfully and sealed her lips with a fingertip covered with her own rich musk. “Not now, Atyr. It’s late. Sleep with me, please?” Then he kissed her again, far gentler than any caress earlier, his thoughts gently pushing away her contact with added emphasis.

~Not now, Mouse. We can talk about it later.~

She fell back to her own mind thinking of how beautiful his voice could have been given that touch.

And the song for the post…  is it foreshadowing?

Not really, I just like Neil Sedaka.  His songs remind me of being a little kid and riding in the (not really a) backseat* of our FIAT Spider

K.L. Schwengel, of My Random Muse,  fearlessly leads the #WIPpet where writers post pieces of a draft (Work In Progress) that somehow relate with the date for fun and discussion. Feel free to comment and visit other #WIPpeteers here. We love company.

Dad liked odd, fun cars

* When I say “not really a backseat”, I mean the place where the convertible top was stored.  Back in those days, seatbelts in the backseat were optional.  Heck, the backseat was optional too.  I used to love laying down in a blanket back there, kind of squeezed in, listening to the new AM/FM stereo my father had added to the car.


Been picking myself up after having fallen down recently.  Still in something of a funk, but the “barrel through”, “Fake it ’til you make it” attitude seems to be working somewhat (crosses fingers in case this post jinxes it).  I confess: I am seriously behind on all my goals.  I took most of last weekend off, just played around, watched television shows, played games…  read stories.  Oh and wrote three different drafts of my ROW80 sponsor post (that makes seven since the round started)….

I hate every one of them.  None of them feel natural or real enough to me…  Granted, Kait would probably be happy if I sent her anything at this point.  I guess I’ve got to force myself through one of them.  Do anything… even if it’s wrong.

Down, down, down into the breech I go.

A last song…  to dance, to move, to get us all moving.

25 responses to “Down… Down down

  1. “Back in those days” we rode loose in the back of the station wagon. No seats, no seatbelts, hanging out the rear window. 😉

    Poor Atyr. It’s got to be even more confusing for her when she can feel his emotions as well. I, for one, would not find sleep very easily after this.


    • Sounds like we had some of the same “back in those days” moments, Kathi. Remember riding in the back of the pick up truck and waving at the people in the car behind you?

      (Never hung out the rear window of the car… ours didn’t open, but I did hang out the back of the cap on my uncle’s F450 a few times.)

      Atyr’s both used to feeling confused by ‘Listii and extra confused by him at the moment. And no, I don’t think I’d sleep easy either.


  2. I like this tension between them. I wish I knew what he was thinking. Is he regretting the depth of what they’ve shared? Is he afraid? I’m not sure if you’ve already said all that and I’m just not remembering.


    • Well, you did guess (I’m not going to say which guess was right yet; next week…)

      I’m glad you liked the tension in the scene. I want there to be undercurrents that feel off, even in the “sweet moments”.

      Thanks for reading, Amy.


  3. That’s how I felt after I finished a run of “The Tempest” back in April. Take a deep breath and remember, sometimes your brain doesn’t want to co-operate with you. I know feeling well. I try to find something I can accomplish, even if it’s only one thing per day. I also tell myself that tomorrow is a new day, a fresh start, a blank canvas. I hope that helps.

    Have a better week! Stop by my little corner of the net if you need to bounce ideas off. I have a great physical and internet ear for listening. 🙂


    • Sorry for getting back to you so late, Cindy, especially since your advice ended up being the thing that really helped me out the most. It did mean I ignored a lot of online things for a few weeks, but… it also meant I got most of my real world and homelife straightened out. Baby steps. Thank you.


  4. I like especially how you show their emotional connection, almost telepathic but maybe a little more subtle. Well done!


    • Yes and no, Alana. Atyr can use telepathy when she wants, ‘Listii can keep her out when he wants… but there’s something between them both that they can’t control (and it’s terrifies them both). Thanks.


  5. Ah, those two broken souls, trying to connect and avoid intimacy, all at once (that’s the feeling I get, here, anyway).

    I’m glad you’re finding your way to a way to feel better. Y’know what I mean.

    Is it wrong that I want to hug ‘Listii, Atyr, and you, now?


    • I think all three of us could use a hug right now (and even more so when I posted this…really am picking myself up now, even emailed that sponsor post).

      And you got the feeling just right, I think.


  6. Bittersweet moments that keep you guessing, that keep life from ever reaching a plateau. This scene was one of them. Women and their mysteries? Ha! Men have them, too. 🙂


    • Oh, men have their secrets in boatloads (I’m married to one of that type). But we make it work. And hopefully these two will too.


  7. I like the “feel” between the characters in this scene, the implied trust combined with the sexual innuendos, hinted at but not expressed explicitly. Good job. 🙂


  8. I always liked Neil Sedaka’s retake on “Breaking Up Is Hard To Do,” the slower, moodier version he recorded in the Seventies. I don’t think I’ve done a “Two For Tuesday” on him, come to think of it…

    I’m sure whatever you throw together for the sponsor post will be fine. In fact, keep the others for next round…


  9. Well I hope they can figure things out… but that song makes me think they probably won’t 😦


  10. Sometimes it’s good to take time off!
    Funny, I’m in the same boat as you. Trying to come up with a brilliant inspirational post for ROW80…


    • Yeah, sometimes it’s good to take time off, but again, sometimes it’s not. And I finally got my post written…. (now that the round is over)


  11. Heheh, the best bit about a convertible was being able to jump out of the back seat when the lid was down without having to climb past the passengers!