I’m not usually one to put myself forward. At least I never thought I was, but when I look around, I keep seeing ways that I have tried to step out and experience some of the World Stage in some other capacity than as gopher and janitor.
This past week another writing challenge that I participate, JuNoWriMo, in has held an open ‘audition’ for featured authors to spotlight on the challenge’s blog. I demurred at entering a post. I mean, who the heck am I? I’m not an ‘author’; often I hesitate to call myself a writer, even though I write (profusely). So I almost let another year pass by without stepping forward with a post.
Oh, I toyed with the idea. Last night, during our local NaNoWriMo group’s weekly write-in, I started plotting the post, answering the questions more as an exercise to get myself into thinking about my story in an all-inclusive sense than the multitude of blogs and snippets I’d visited yesterday for the Weekend Writing Warriors bloghop. As much fun as I have participating, I find it’s hard to come home to my story after a day of bloghopping, and sometimes the near-thoughtless act of answering stock questions about my story and my writing helps me refocus.
And… being asked to write a synopsis of my story is always a good challenge for me, because frankly, I suck at trying to winnow down all these characters and their emotional/physical traumas into a few impact laden sentences.
But today, because of a post by Shan Jeniah, I looked a bit closer at my choice to even start that feature… that post that I was writing because I just wanted to practice. Or did I? I thought again of some of my other online activities: my participation in writing blog hops such at the Weekend Writers and the WIPpet Wednesdays, about my creation of a First Friday Photo, about even my choice to be a sponsor in the ROW80, and so many other choices I’ve made in my life where I tried to step out into the spotlights for just a moment. And I decided to take the plunge and try entering a post.
Stepping forward in this manner shouldn’t be as hard as it is It’s staggering however. As much as I stepped out and made a small place in those things I listed, the things weren’t about me, no more than the JuNoWriMo is about me. This feature piece however is about me (well, as is this one you are reading in a different way); it’s about me saying “look at me; I do this, and I’m damned proud of it”. As Shan notes in her post, most of us aren’t taught to speak for ourselves this way.
Bios of any kind trip me up. I usually fall back of self-effacing humor and deflection. The one paragraph blurb on my main blog has a picture I took and mentions furniture and unpacking but no mention of what I do. It’s not even on an “About” page.
But I’m going to try to show myself a bit more this time.
And that, is what I’ve done since last week’s ROW80 check-in in addition to maintaining steady progress on most all of my goals. I fell behind on my push-up goal somewhat in all the desk-time.
That’s it for me today. What new ways are you trying to grow and more deeply become who you are?
Please step in and visit and encourage other ROW80 participants via our linky.