You May Not

Not much to post as far as my ROW80 progress this week.  The holiday skewed me up some, and regular old character distractions…  (they suddenly all seem to want to share stories with me that have nothing to do with the pieces I’ve tried to work on).  I did get my NaNoWriMo win (will probably hit 60K for this month, but with so very much to just toss, I’m not sure it’s helped much).

House hunting is going along slowly.  We finally have enough saved up for an adequate down-payment.  So we’ll be placing an offer after this next run of showings.  If only it didn’t seem like there was someone out there intentionally throwing monkey wrenches in the affair…

And now for the WIPpet

Today I have the last seven paragraphs of Marche/Promenade I’ll be sharing with you for a while (2-9=(-)7).   It makes for a bit longer post, but this feels like a good stopping point.  We’re still with Valichii, in the opening chapter of the story.   As in previous weeks, the last line of the prior WIPpet is included in a different color at the opening of this entry.

You’re late, Major. Head on up. The Katsdan wants you to liaise for him.”

Rather than argue that he was exactly on time—early even—, Val nodded to Hurla before he trotted the last few paces to the crown of the hill. Late, as much as any measure, depended on the enemy. Dare he take a moment to look around their vantage before greeting the two commanders? It wasn’t as if the pair of them actually needed his presence to pass messages between them at the moment. Would it be too much to hope he could serve more purpose than to stand by without any intel to offer? Especially when the first thing he would be asked when he arrived would be “what do you think?” if the past few weeks were anything to go by.

Best not. He didn’t want to be seen pausing, not now when both Army and Guard seemed to be convinced he was late to his post, and the commanders of both forces had turned to face him with barely concealed impatience.

Val stopped short Lan Kailiis’s mount and near-dove to kneel before the man. “Sir!” He considered, then tossed aside, the idea of apologizing for his delay. Even if Lan brought up the topic, they both knew apologies meant nothing to the men whose lives were dictated by careful timing.

Not having another reason for taking his time—he would have almost appreciated being called home now—, Val rose slowly, so he might see something of the landscape before the questions started.. For a second, he wondered why; it wasn’t like Mother to forget—unless she’d finally taken to heart all the times he’d told her she’d caught him in the middle of a life or death matter.

Not that Mother ever seemed to understand why the average soldier’s life mattered to him as much as his own…

As his raised his gaze to meet his commanders’, Val found his attention drawn to gathering of infantry men along the southern marches. Too close to the creek and marshes, by far. He faced his Katsdan directly. “Sir, if I may—.”

Lan Kailiis gave him a stare that would have been worthy of any of Val’s own kinsmen. “You may not, Major.” The man turned away to face his associate. “Your lieutenants have their orders, Torn?”

Next week I will be begin sharing excerpts of the opening for Singer of the Swan Song (book 1A of the Swan Song Series).  Fixing the piece has been my NaNoWriMo project, and I intend to use my WIPpet posts to urge my continued  progress on this rewrite.

Hope you have enjoyed this selection from only of my Works In Progress.  If you’d like to see a few more, head over to the WIPpet linky and visit some our other awesome members.  And thanks, of course to our hostess Emily Wrayburn.

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7 responses to “You May Not

  1. I’m finding this snippet confusing…lots of stuff going on beneath the surface.

    But hooray for progress!

    Liked by 1 person

    • There is meant to be a lot going on under the surface, but… confused reader is NOT the effect I was going for. I rather hoped the reader would catch on to some things Val thinks he might be seeing but isn’t sure of.

      So if you’d be willing to offer me some ideas of what specifically confused you (I’d be eternally grateful. Or at least… I’d happily buy you a latte to pay for the effort.)

      And yes, progress is a wonderful thing

      Like

      • It’s not specific – more a general feeling that I should be “getting” stuff that I’m not. I’d say maybe we could use a bit of distance from Val, so that we can be given more detail in a less personal way.

        Like

        • Hmmm… did you read the other entries that follow on it? I’m wondering, because it SHOULD all flow together. But it could also be that Val’s perspective is too narrow. I’ll have to look later.

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          • I’m not sure which I’ve read….life has been very busy and scattered.

            If this is the opening, though – it’s more confusing to me than it is a hook. I’d need to know more of the dynamics of these relationships to get the gist.

            Right now, things are busy, but if you point me to the other bits, I’d be happy to read them between rounds, when I have a lull.

            Like

            • Well, if you don’t mind, I’ll show you the gathered pieces when we can get together some day. It’ll keep until then just fine. The busy, scattered life is… all too familiar.

              Liked by 1 person

  2. And down payments, too!

    Liked by 1 person

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